Archive for the ‘sex’ Category

Just a little FYI from me to you.  When your sweet girl told you she needed to get to school early for tutoring…or when her darling boyfriend with the full-on Scottsman beard picked her up early so they could go get donuts before school…you might have thought for a moment if either of those two scenarios were really going to happen…because…

this morning when I dropped the Junior off to go to Chemistry tutoring, I think I saw your sweet daughter carrying on in the car with the sweet boy who was going to buy her breakfast.  I’m talking full-on, seats laid back “carrying on,” if you know what I mean. 

I’m talking about the OH MY GOD REALLY!?!? sort of “carrying on” here.

And know this, I am no prude.  I realize that teenagers have been making out in cars since the Ice Age…however, have we done it in the parking lot at the high school?  Really???  Where parents are going to drive by and see into the little car and see that the kids have the seats laid all the way back and they are “carrying on,” so to speak?

I don’t know about y’all, but my mother taught me that you shouldn’t ever make yourself look cheap.  Sure, there were those among us (but, of course, not me, as I never had a boyfriend in high school) in high school who probably went to school “fully satisfied,” but no one that I knew in high school chose to do “that” IN THE PARKING LOT WHERE PEOPLE WERE DRIVING BY TO SEE YOU.

I guess what I’m saying is that really…could you impress in your teenager’s mind how trashy it might look to do THAT in the parking lot of the high school?  Seriously, folks, I have my 9-year-old son in the car when I pick up the Junior.  He has seen more ‘macking down’ in the parking lot than if I just let him watch a DeGrassi marathon. 

I mean, really, there is this one little couple who make me want to turn my head away when he walks her to the car, which her grandfather is driving, and he kisses her like, I mean, seriously, like they should get a damn room. 

Anyway, what I am saying to you is this…if, maybe, you’d like to NOT be grandparents very soon, perhaps you should double check if Lindsey is, indeed, going to tutoring or having tasty donuts with the boyfriend with the full-on beard and the car that has the seats that lay all the way back.  Or, perhaps you could impress on Lindsey’s brain that it just looks bad…with her blowing the boyfriend before she even goes into the school house.

I just know that if it was my fair-haired daughter in the car taking care of business before 8 a.m. even came around, I’d sorta want someone to give me the head’s up…so to speak.

And I mean that sincerely.  Your daughter and her boyfriend have opened up the door for me to have the conversation with my Junior about how cheap it looks to be doing Lord knows what in the parking lot of the band hall…and if you EVER see my Junior taking care of any kind of “business” in the parking lot, please…FEEL FREE TO CALL ME AND TELL ME, because really….

It does not scream…


And yes, the Mr. has told me that perhaps I have lost touch with what being a teenager is all about, but really…a parking lot…at the high school?

Personally, I don’t think it is too much to ask that our teens don’t ‘take care of their bidness’ in the parking lot where I am driving by…

Please, tell me if I am just RAWNG.
And yes, I’m perfectly aware that I sound really, really OLLLLLLLLLLD, but hey, I’m about to turn FORTY FOUR, so I can.


The Mom of Another Teen that I’d Like to Think won’t be giving her boyfriend a Happy Ending before Algebra I

Hearts and Flowers everyone, I am going to watch Project Runway reruns. 


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